tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-188016472024-03-07T01:26:41.663-05:00Graveyard SoupMorriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.comBlogger84125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-83650640424974481962013-03-18T14:32:00.001-04:002013-03-18T14:32:35.799-04:00MarchThe delicate birch twigs that etch the clear blue skies of March now dangle with catkins, and the gray, fuzzy buds of pussy willow swell. Brave crocus break though the still frosty ground, opening their petals to the sun. Beneath the blanket of leaves that has covered the herb garden throughout its long winters sleep, the peppermint is sending out new runners, and tiny whorls of woodruff leaves dot the ground. In the woodland garden, patches of moss grow a thick, lush green, and the strange and exotic flowers of the skunk cabbage bloom.<br />A love struck starling throws back his head and sings a courting song to his mate, who already wears the sleek, black feathers of spring, while in the open meadows flocks of migrating robins graze in the still-brown grass. In the hedgerows, cock pheasants, like phoenixes come to life from an ancient Chinese vase, challange one another with fierce displays of feathers and spurs.<br />On a day in March, while the herb garden still lies dormant under its blanket of leaves, when crocus and snowdrops begin to push through the frosty earth and when the pussy willow buds begin to break and the robins return to their ancestral nesting sites- take a moment to immerse yourself in the wonderous cycle of life happening all around you.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-36891366494756208892012-12-02T08:18:00.003-05:002012-12-02T08:18:56.812-05:00The HolidaysIn the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season.<br /> The Christians called it “Christmas” and went to church.<br /> The Jews called it “Hanukkah” and went to synagogue.<br /> The atheists went to parties and drank.<br /><br />These days, people say “Seasons Greetings”, which when you think about it, means nothing. It’s like walking up to someone and saying “Appropriate Remark” in a loud and cheerful voice.<br /><br />Some of you may be unhappy with this dereligionizing of the Holiday Season and you may have decided that you’re going to celebrate the old fashioned way, with your family sitting around stringing cranberries and exchanging homemade gifts.<br /> Well, you can forget it.<br /> If everyone pulled a stunt like that, the economy would collapse overnight. The government would have to intervene, forming a cabinet level Department of Holiday Gifting, which would spend billions and billions of tax dollars to buy Barbie dolls and electronic games, which it would drop on the populace from Air Force jets, killing and maiming thousands. So, for the good of the nation, you should go along with the program. This means you should get a large sum of money and go to a mall.<br /><br />When you get to the mall, the first thing to remember is that you should not park in the mall parking lot and walk to the mall buildings, because you will probably get killed. Instead drive your car right up to and, if possible, right into the mall building. This is perfectly legal, people do it all the time. In almost every mall I’ve ever been to, the corridors were littered with cars, RVs, snowmobiles and boats left by smart parkers.<br /><br />Now you are ready for the actual shopping. Your goal should be to get it over with as quickly as possible.<br /><br />Here is a very efficient shopping method: Divide the amount of money you have by the number of people on your gift list. So if you have $160 and you have 10 people on your list, your average is $16 per person. Now find something that costs $16 and buy 10 of whatever it is. You’ll find many useful gifts in this price range; for example, you could get 10 bottles of Vitamin B. Everyone can use Vitamin B and your children are sure to shriek with delight when they find it under the tree.<br /><br />If you want to buy gifts that are a little more personal, here are some guidelines:<br /><br />Gifts for Men<br /><br />Men are amused by almost any idiot thing, that is why professional ice hockey is so popular. So buying gifts for them is easy. But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe that they already have all the clothes they will ever need and new ones make them nervous. If you give him something even as simple as a new tie, he will pretend to like it, but deep inside he will hate you. If you want to give a man something practical, consider tires.<br /><br />Gifts for Women<br /><br />Again, you should avoid buying clothes. Not because women don’t like clothes, the problem here is sizes. Women’s clothing sizes don’t mean anything,they vary from store to store, from manufacturer to manufacturer depending on the day of the week or the time of year. Trying to buy clothes will give you migraine headaches or cause you to spend time in the nearest bar. This means you will drink too much and end up having to go to AA meetings. Plus all those meetings really cuts into your available shopping time.<br /><br />The safest gifts for women are expensive little bottles of scented liquids. These are sold at cosmetic counters under names such as “Eau De Water de Toilette” and “Endless Nights of Endless Nights”.<br /><br />Gifts for Children<br /><br />This is really easy, you never have to figure out what to buy for kids because they will tell you, over and over and over……………… Just make sure that you get them exactly what they ask for, even if you disapprove of their choices. If the child thinks that they want Murderous Bob, the toy with the face that you can rip right off, you’d better get it. Now you may be worried that it might help to encourage the childs’ anti-social tendencies, but you have not seen anti-social tendencies until you have witnessed a child who is convinced that they have not been given the right gift.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-19688364989649901082012-09-20T22:19:00.002-04:002012-09-20T22:19:43.805-04:00A Fairy TaleOnce upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent and self assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat on the shores of a lovely pond in a verdant meadow near her home.<br />The frog hopped into the princesses lap and said,<br /><br />"Elegant Lady, I was once, a very long time ago, a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you however, and I will turn back into the powerful man that I was. Then my sweet, my government shall return and I shall take care of your every need. I will take charge of every aspect of your life, protect you from harm and re-institute all the laws. All you will have to do for this service is to forever feel grateful and happy as you bow to my every demand. It will all be for your own good, for you will no longer have any cares."<br /><br />That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought, " I don't fucking think so."Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-44207548142678098062012-07-11T08:58:00.000-04:002012-07-11T08:58:08.158-04:00JulyThe heat and haze of summer afternoons, the buzz of the cicadas in the still, oppressive air, are sometimes interrupted by a sudden summer storm. More often the roll of distant thunder brings no rain to relieve the heat or quench the parched vegetables. Leaves wilt in the afternoon heat. When rain does come, it is often in the form of a downpour with such pounding force that it bruises the leaves of growing plants, releasing the fragrance of a multitude of herbs into the warm, moist air.<br />The first major harvest from the garden is cabbage. When all the cabbage has been picked, I remove the outer leaves for stuffing and split the heads. I slice the quartered heads dime thin, weigh the shredded vegetable and then add three tablespoons of salt to each five pounds. Then the cabbage is stomped in an old crock until it is covered with its own liquid. This will ferment in the cellar until it is canned sometime during the waning moon in September.<br />Later in the month, when all the plants have turned yellow and fallen over, the potatoes are ready to harvest. Jeff2 gently turns the soil with a pitch fork while I follow him, my bare feet planted in the dirt, my fingers feeling in the warm moist soil for the potatoes as the rich loamy aroma wafts up into my nose.<br />By the last day of the month, our harvest is in full swing. We have tasted the abundance, we have eaten our fill of tomatoes and peaches and corn on the cob. I have begun to can tomatoes and pickle cucumbers, and the cellar is beginning to be filled.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-34281876794923233872011-10-30T07:40:00.002-04:002011-10-30T08:21:20.051-04:00Choices abd ConsequencesThe young man lay dying. He knew this to be a fact, he knew he was mortally wounded.<br />An older man approached him, this surprised him as everyone he knew was either dead or dying, and this man was in perfect health.<br />“Who are you?” the young man asked.<br />“I am you.” the older man answered simply.<br />“How can that be, I am dying……I won’t live to be old.”<br />The older man settled down beside the younger man, and made himself comfortable before replying.<br />“Because in a different life you made a different choice.”<br />“You’re crazy” the younger man replied “How can that be, I am right here, and I know that I am done for.”<br />“See, what you don’t understand is that you have had this choice before, and you chose differently.” The older man appeared to be lost in remembering.<br />Then a great saddness came over him, an almost visible weight that made him appear even older………<br />“Because in my lifetime, you chose to live. You decided that being alive was more important than being true to yourself. You decided that it was better to believe whatever you were told, instead of thinking for yourself.” the old man replied.<br />“I don’t believe you.” the younger man answered “I wouldn’t do that.”<br />“You decided,” the older man continued as if he hadn’t heard, “that no matter what you had to do, you would live.”<br />The older man was quiet for a moment and tears came into his eyes.<br />“You betrayed your friends, your morals and even your family. You turned a blind eye to what was really happening, as long as you could live. You watched as the world turned upside down, caring more for yourself than for anyone else. Your fear of being different, of being noticed, of what “they” could do to you was more important than finding out the truth. It was more important than acting on what you knew was right. It was more important than protecting your friends and your family. It was more important than taking responsibility for yourself. Of standing for something. “<br />The old man stopped for a moment. Wracked by sobs, he was having trouble speaking.<br />Finally he began again, “So you lived a long time. But you lived without your friends and your family. You were totally alone, but you were alive. It took a long time for you to realise that there is so much more to really living than just drawing breath. All of your life it was others who told you what to do, where to go and how to live. Finally, finally you realized that what you had bought when you sold out was existance, not life. As a result you became a slave, a certified numbered, poked and prodded piece of chattel.”<br />The old man shifted his position, wiped his eyes and cleared his throat.<br />“Then you began to remember and to think. You remembered your family and your friends. You finally felt regret. You finally remembered that standing up is better than being led. That being alive doesn’t mean a damn thing if you sell out. “<br />The old man shifted his position again so he could look the younger man in the eye.<br />“You finally remembered that you had a choice, that your life didn’t have to be an empty and meaningless series of days and routines. So you went back to that moment when you made that choice to sell out, to save yourself. You and your friends decided that to sacrifice yourselves to save your families was the only moral and meaningful decision. So, here I am………… here I am again, but with a different choice. In my lifetime all this was swept under the carpet, because I sold everyone out, and no one knew what happened here.”<br />The old man shook his head and pointed, “Look around you; you and your friends gave your lives to save others, to save your families. This time this will not go unnoticed, things will begin to change, because with your sacrifice you gave people hope. They will see that change is possible, and necessary. Oh, not all of them, but enough.”<br />“So what are you going to do?” the younger man asked.<br />Quietly the older man answered, ” Do what I should have done instead of being a selfish coward. I will die here with you.”Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-12342197981340060432011-10-25T08:02:00.002-04:002011-10-25T08:49:24.584-04:00T.O.B.A.This stands for Tough Old Broads Association.<br /><br />I have not posted here in a long time, and it is past time for me to do so. This site has evolved into a place for my alter-ego to say all those things that are normally left unspoken. Things that you want to say, but for the sake of peace and harmony you bite your tongue and don't say out loud. Well, I am damned tired of holding it all in. Of biting my tongue off. It is time to vent.<br />.....<br />Oh where to start.........where to start.........there is no lack of material.<br /><br />Just how do you know if you are a tough old broad? It really is quite simple. If you have survived- with your brain mostly intact-raising children, dealing with men, a job........sometimes just life, you qualify.<br /><br />If you are tired of dealing with air headed bimbos with their expensive clothes, hair, make-up, lipo-suctioned, face-lifted, ass lifted and breast augmented bodies......useless as shit on a pump handle and dumb as a monkeys ass.....you are welcome here.<br /><br />If you are tired of dealing with men. I really don't want to lump them all into one basic category, but let's face the facts here. I have yet to meet a single one who will be straight up with you. Who will not tell you what they think you want to hear. Who treats you like a person, an intelligent human being......you are welcome here.<br /><br />Sarcasm has become my marching song. I just can't seem to get by with out it anymore. Sadly, most people don't even catch the fact that I am being sarcastic. It just flies right over their heads......too bad it can't drop shit on its way over.....................maybe that would get their attention.<br /><br />Where has honesty, integrity. morals, common sense and common courtesy dissappeared to? What I have experienced is the fact that everyone is out for themselves, me first and fuck you if you happen to get in the way. I am worn out and tired of the bullshit. I am fed up with people who complain, whine, bitch and complain some more. but are totally unwilling to grow a spine and do what needs to be done. At that point you deserve the consequences of your own actions or in-actions. Period. You tolerate it, you send the message that it is ok. So shut up and deal already. Obviously things are not bad enough to walk away from.<br /><br />I AM a tough old broad. Sometimes I am a tough old cast iron bitch. Mostly I am just tired of people not having enough of a back bone to be just be honest.<br /><br />More to come..............Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-53403685588754921782009-02-14T08:23:00.001-05:002009-02-14T08:30:06.531-05:00FebuaryJust doing a sort post to keep this blog updated.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-70213161059889565822008-05-05T11:16:00.003-04:002008-05-05T13:37:17.496-04:00RantI know I have not updated this blog with a post in quite a while. Well Now is the time. I have some things to get off my chest with a good old rant. I got started on this train of thought by a post this morning at <a href="http://mrsjosegoldbloom/wordpress.com">Goldblooms Padded Cell</a>...............<br /><br />1. Laundry- This is a job that never ends. I don't mind doing laundry. I would just like to see an empty hamper for more than 5 minutes. At least I don't usually have to go around and pick up the clothes but I still stare in amazement at the sheer quantity! Just how many times a day do some of you people have to change your clothes?<br /><br />2. Dishes- Does anyone know how to pick up a cup, glass, plate, bowl etc. and take it to the kitchen? These things will not grow legs and walk themselves to the sink. And how about rinsing out one of these things? I really get no pleasure out of having to scrub off dried on whatever out of said cups, glasses, plates, bowls and assorted silver ware. Or of having to clean up spilled soda from inside the refrigerator. If you are going to open a can of soda, drink the damn thing! Don't pour half of it into a glass and set the open can in the fridge. This is an accident just waiting to happen.<br /><br />3. I am a stay at home grandma. This does NOT mean that I sit around all day with my feet up watching soap operas and eating bon bons while being waited on hand and foot by nubile handsome young men. It DOES mean that I do all the housework, laundry, shopping, yardwork, cooking, caring for the four year old grandson, errands for others and just about anything else.<br /><br />4. Taking out the trash- Now this is hardly a highly technical accomplishment. Yet I am the only person who seems to understand that when the trash can in the kitchen is full that it needs to emptied. NOT crammed even fuller. Or that it is acceptable to let said trash fall over onto the floor.<br /><br />5. Day off- This is a term that I have no experience with. However I have observed other members of this household doing things like sleeping all day, reading for hours, spending hours at a time playing computer games etc.. Then saying how nice it was to not have to do anything all day. PLEASE let me experience this just once!Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-50250182373933201132007-12-08T08:28:00.000-05:002007-12-08T08:29:36.181-05:00Guide for the holidays........<div class="postentry"> <div class="snap_preview"><p>In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season. The Christians called it “Christmas” and went to church. The Jews called it “Hanukka” and went to synagogue. The atheists went to parties and drank.</p> <p>These days, people say “Seasons Greetings”, which when you think about it, means nothing. It’s like walking up to someone and saying “Appropriate Remark” in a loud and cheerful voice.</p> <p>Some of you may be unhappy with this dereligionizing of the Holiday Season and you may have decided that you’re going to celebrate the old fashioned way, with your family sitting around stringing cranberries and exchanging homemade gifts. Well, you can forget it. If everyone pulled a stunt like that, the economy would collapse overnight. The government would have to intervene, forming a cabinet level Department of Holiday Gifting, which would spend billions and billions of tax dollars to buy Barbie dolls and electronic games, which it would drop on the populace from Air Force jets, killing and maiming thousands. So, for the good of the nation, you should go along with the program. This means you should get a large sum of money and go to a mall.</p> <p>When you get to the mall, the first thing to remember is that you should not park in the mall parking lot and walk to the mall buildings, because you will probably get killed. Instead drive your car right up to and, if possible, right into the mall building. This is perfectly legal, people do it all the time. In almost every mall I’ve ever been to, the corridors were littered with cars, RVs, snowmobiles and boats left by smart parkers.</p> <p>Now you are ready for the actual shopping. Your goal should be to get it over with as quickly as possible.</p> <p>Here is a very efficient shopping method: Divide the amount of money you have by the number of people on your gift list. So if you have $160 and you have 10 people on your list, your average is $16 per person. Now find something that costs $16 and buy 10 of whatever it is. You’ll find many useful gifts in this price range; for example, you could get 10 bottles of Vitamin B. Everyone can use Vitamin B and your children are sure to shriek with delight when they find it under the tree.</p> <p>If you want to buy gifts that are a little more personal, here are some guidelines:</p> <p>Gifts for Men</p> <p>Men are amused by almost any idiot thing, that is why professional ice hockey is so popular. So buying gifts for them is easy. But you should never buy them clothes. Men believe that they already have all the clothes they will ever need and new ones make them nervous. If you give him something even as simple as a new tie, he will pretend to like it, but deep inside he will hate you. If you want to give a man something practical, consider tires.</p> <p>Gifts for Women</p> <p>Again, you should avoid buying clothes. Not because women don’t like clothes, the problem here is sizes. Women’s clothing sizes don’t mean anything,they vary from store to store, from manufacturer to manufacturer depending on the day of the week or the time of year. Trying to buy clothes will give you migraine headaches or cause you to spend time in the nearest bar. This means you will drink too much and end up having to go to AA meetings. Plus it really cuts into your available shopping time.</p> <p>The safest gifts for women are expensive little bottles of scented liquids. These are sold at cosmetic counters under names such as “Eau De Water” and “Endless Nights of Heavy Petting”.</p> <p>Gifts for Children</p> <p>This is really easy, you never have to figure out what to buy for kids because they will tell you, over and over and over……………… Just make sure that you get them exactly what they ask for, even if you disapprove of their choices. If the child thinks that they want Murderous Bob, the toy with the face that you can rip right off, you’d better get it. Now you may be worried that it might help to encourage the childs’ anti-social tendencies, but you have not seen anti-social tendencies until you have witnessed a child who is convinced that they have not been given the right gift.</p> </div> </div>Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-79787601311844192922007-10-16T14:06:00.000-04:002007-10-16T14:09:32.287-04:00All Hallows Eve<div class="postentry"> <div class="snap_preview"><p>Spent sunflowers rustle in unison with the bleached cornstalks outside the window. Their bony stems and withered leaves mimic the stark silhouettes of trees rapidly losing their vestments of red, yellow and brown. Autumn passes away in the skittering leaves that fly just out of reach, like so many summer days.</p> <p>Oidche Shamhna, “the night of Samhain,” approaches. The fire that lights the night on October 31 crackles brilliantly with disorder signaling harvest’s end, the end of autumn and the end of the Celtic year. As the bonfire leaps skyward, it rends the boundaries between worlds and years, stirring the souls of the dead and those yet living. When the great bonfire finally sees ashes on November 1, the new Celtic year, the winter and the season of Death have arrived.</p> <p>The festival of Samhain is the origin of our contemporary “Halloween.” Too potent to be banished by time and Christianity, remnants of the original celebration remain. These “remnants” echo of still-living traditions powerful enough to open a door to the Otherworld.</p> <p>Tradition without essence is meaningless, at best, empty sentimentality. The black cats, grinning pumpkins and trick-or-treats of Halloween satisfy little except a sweet tooth and possibly the temporary atmospheric appreciation of a moonlit, windy night. However, coupled with the archaic remains of the Samhain festival, these simple conventions become compelling indeed.</p> <p>Marking the end of the year, Samhain heralds the disintegration of the old order and the calends of the new. Let us look at some traditions that honour the arrival of the Otherworldly host such as divinations, feasting, masquerades and the use of harvest symbols.</p> <p>The harvest that began at Lughnasadh (first harvest) is seconded at Mabon , the autumnal equinox, and finds its fruition in the third and final harvest at Samhain. Fruits and nuts are the last gifts of nature to be gathered. Pomona, the Roman goddess of fruit-bearing trees holds the apple as her symbol. At the horizontal centre of the apple is a five-pointed star, sacred to the Goddess. Mythologies the world over are replete with sacred fruits and precious apples, often located in otherworldly groves or gardens such as Avalon, Tir na nOg or the Garden of Eden.</p> <p>Divinations at Samhain reflect the need to discern the germ of new beginnings from the whirling debris of dissolution at year-end. Both apples and nuts find an enduring role of love and fertility in these traditions. Halloween is also known as “Nutcrack Night,” for the hazel and walnuts that are placed on a fire or stove to foretell the fidelity of lovers. Hazel nuts and water are particularly divinatory, harking back to the Well of Connla, where the nine hazel trees of wisdom drop their nuts into the murmuring waters.</p> <p>The predominant colour of Samhain is black. Black is the winter, the moldering leaves, the rich underworld womb to which seeds of plants and ideas close their eyes for the winter. Black is the waning moon, the magnificent darkness of the crone of wisdom, the Cailleach (Old Woman), the bone-rattling Baba Yaga(fearsome witch of Russian folklore) and our Halloween “witch.” Long sacred to the moon goddess and the world of spirit, cats find their natural place alongside the Cailleach, as well as the owl, a bird of wisdom.</p> <p>Carved pumpkins are a delightful Halloween tradition, brought to the United States by 18th century Irish immigrants. The pumpkin made a good substitute for carved turnip lanterns and introduced the Jack’o'lantern to the new world.</p> <p>The Feile na Marbh (”fayluh nuh morv”) is the origin of our trick-or-treat tradition. As the veil between worlds thins, all manner of spirits walk abroad on Samhain, including those of loved ones passed on. An empty chair by the fire, porridge and tobacco were left along with a candle in the window to guide the hungry ghosts home for comfort and to seek their blessing in the coming year. Spirits who found their homes less than inviting were inclined to withhold their blessing and misfortune often befell those so uncivil.</p> <p>The wearing of masque and costume on Samhain is to deceive wandering spirits, lest they recognize and call you to the Otherworld before your time. Wearing masques and dressing as an animal is also very old magic for assimilating the strength and spirit of a revered creature. The carrying of noisemakers fractures the ordinary drone of this world and opens a space for Otherworldly messages to break through.</p> <p>A very old aspect of Samhain is sortilege, the act of deciding something by casting lots. While the burning ““Wicker Man” tales are probably not fact-based, it is likely that sacrifice by lot was performed throughout the ancient world. The sacrifice of a king or other designee imitated nature and dedicated life energy in a time of seasonal decline. The modern interpretation of this custom is the baking of cakes, Colcannon (mashed potatoes, cabbage with either ham or bacon) or Barmbrack (Irish spicy fruit bread) with tokens within to select a festive “Lord of Misrule” or otherwise divine the future by the type of token found inside.</p> <p>By enlivening the human senses through divination, disguise, propitiation, sound and imagery, a temenos is created, a divine common ground, wherein the ordinary and the universal exist as one. In the death of days and outlived ways of being comes renewal and the living promise of rebirth in even the darkest seasons of mortal life.</p> <p>This Halloween, light a candle, tell a story, embrace the beautiful chaos of Samhain - the rattling leaves are speaking to you. Blessed Be, Happy New Year.</p> </div> </div>Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-68357958536582069062007-06-04T08:00:00.000-04:002007-06-04T08:03:48.742-04:00More LevityA man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"<br /><br /><br /><br />St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."<br /><br /><br /><br />"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"<br /><br /><br /><br />"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."<br /><br /><br /><br />"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"<br /><br /><br /><br />St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />"Where's Hillary Clinton's clock?" asked the man.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />"Hillary's clock is over there", St. Peter pointed, "We're using it as a ceiling fan."<br /><br /><br />"And over there is Bush's' clock, we are using it as a hedge trimmer."Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-16188827135723271072007-03-27T12:01:00.000-04:002007-03-27T12:03:46.278-04:00A bit of levity<span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:85%;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> In the year 2007, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the<br />United States, and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and<br />overpopulated and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another<br /> Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."<br /><br />He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have six months to build the<br /> Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights".<br /><br />Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard<br />. . but no ark.<br /><br />"Noah", He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark ?"<br /><br />"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah. "But things have changed. I needed a<br />building permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for<br />a sprinkler system. My neighbors claim that I've violated the<br />neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding<br />the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for<br />a decision. Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be<br />posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead<br />obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea. I<br />argued that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing<br />of it.<br /><br />Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local<br />trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the<br />environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls. But no go!<br /><br />When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by an animal rights<br />group. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their<br />will. As well, they argued the accommodation was too restrictive and it<br />was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.<br /><br />Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted<br />an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.<br /><br />I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission<br />on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew. Also,<br />the trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire<br />only Union workers with Ark building experience. To make matters worse,<br />the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country<br />illegally with endangered species.<br /><br />So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least ten years for me to<br />finish this Ark. "<br /><br />Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow<br />stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean,<br />You're not going to destroy the world?".<br /><br />"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."</span></span>Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-10803539962457114672007-03-15T09:21:00.000-04:002007-03-15T09:29:30.361-04:00Which Tarot card are you?<p align="center"><img src="http://www.flarn.com/%7Ewarlock/tarot/dragon/2.jpg" /></p><br /><h2 align="center"><span style="font-family:Verdana;"><b>You are The High Priestess</b></span></h2><br /><p align="center"><span style="font-family:Verdana;">Science, Wisdom, Knowledge, Education.</span></p><span style="font-family:Verdana;">The High Priestess is the card of knowledge, instinctual, supernatural, secret knowledge. She holds scrolls of arcane information that she might, or might not reveal to you. The moon crown on her head as well as the crescent by her foot indicates her willingness to illuminate what you otherwise might not see, reveal the secrets you need to know. The High Priestess is also associated with the moon however and can also indicate change or fluxuation, particularily when it comes to your moods.<br /><a href="http://www.flarn.com/%7Ewarlock/tarot/">Find out which Tarot card you are.</a><br /></span>Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-81728574682188345682007-03-13T08:08:00.000-04:002007-03-13T08:13:30.206-04:00WordsWhen you think about it, words can be very funny things. Depending on the context and intent of the user, they can mean different things.<br />Take the word, truth for example. The dictionary defines truth as:<br /><br />Conformity to fact or actuality.<br />A statement proven to be or accepted as true.<br />Sincerity; integrity.<br />Fidelity to an original or standard.<br /><br />Reality; actuality.<br />often Truth That which is considered to be the supreme reality and to have the ultimate meaning and value of existence.<br /><br />Sometimes I find it amazing that people can convince themselves that they can bend, mold or ignore the meaning of words to suit a situation. Kind of the end justifying the means.<br /><br />Sometimes I have words or the meaning of the word get stuck in my thoughts. I think of the person that has used a particular word recently, and I wonder just what their intended meaning really was. Words can be so powerful, hurtful, liberating, or deceptive.<br /><br />Deceive is another very interesting word, ( deceive, to cause to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid ) along with one of its synonyms, beguile.<br />Beguile stresses the use of charm and persuasion in deceiving.<br /><br />Occasionally we need to stop and look at the way we use words. At the very least think about the way that words are being used by others.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-72972335618972137462007-03-02T11:45:00.000-05:002007-03-02T11:47:43.298-05:00The Insanity ContinuesWhat do I see when I go to look at news today? More coverage of the dead blond bimbo.<br />Let to go.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1172582074927114482007-02-27T08:02:00.000-05:002007-02-27T08:14:34.940-05:00Puppet TheatreThe talking heads on the so called news have latched onto more crap. Who really gives a crap about a dead blond druggie Marilyn Monroe wanna be? Other than her family?<br />Who really cares if another blond druggie wants to shave her head and get a tattoo?<br />This crap is news? Not by a long shot.<br />But the folks who pull the strings of the talking heads are focusing on this manure and presenting it like it really was news. What about the real things that are going on in this country and the rest of the world?<br /><br />This is just a newer version of the old bait and switch. A person turns on the news expecting, well news. Instead they get a load of crap. The same sort of nonsense that is discussed in beauty shops, which is where it belongs.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1170340898773629402007-02-01T09:36:00.000-05:002007-02-01T09:41:38.773-05:00Just a thoughtFor a while I thought about just abandoning this blog, but in retrospect I think that I will use this as a medium to post things that I feel do not belong on the blog I keep about our gulch.<br />Sometimes I just need to rant about things, and those just do not belong in my gulch blog.<br /><br />So this will serve a different purpose , and probably a good one. It will help to keep me sane in an ever increasingly insane world.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1164122149682266142006-11-21T10:13:00.000-05:002006-11-21T10:15:49.696-05:00UpdateJust to keep this site up and current.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1148150330811830682006-05-20T14:19:00.000-04:002006-05-20T14:38:52.856-04:00Moving the blogSince many people could no longer view my blog, I have moved it.<br />Road Kill Cafe now lives at: <a href="http://morrigantoo.wordpress.com/">Road Kill Cafe</a><br /><br />I will no longer be posting here at blogspot, but I will leave this up for a while.<br />Come see me in<a href="http://morrigantoo.wordpress.com/"> my new digs!</a>Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1147867577866049222006-05-17T07:56:00.000-04:002006-05-17T08:06:17.883-04:00BirdsA mama bird built a nest on top of a post in the corner of our front porch. She laid her eggs and had a bumper crop of babies. They are getting big, almost crowding each other out of the nest.<br />I have a good view of the nest from our bedroom window. While the mama bird was fliying to and fro feeding her family, I counted six baby birds in that nest. How they manage not to knock each other out onto the porch floor below is a mystery. Much less how the mama bird manages to get in that nest with them at night.<br />It is intresting watching her fly to and fro trying to keep all those babies fed. It is just about all she does during the day. <br />I'll bet she will be glad when they are out on their own.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1147615936031278992006-05-14T09:44:00.000-04:002006-05-14T10:12:16.043-04:00Mothers DayI will warn you that I tend to wax nostalgic about stuff like this. I have fond memories of my children and grandchildren. They are tucked away into a special place in my heart. It is a place with memories that are as fresh as when they were brand new.<br />I can recall some of my most treasured moments. The way it feels when a baby snuggles up and drifts off to sleep, the contentedness of time seeming to stop while nursing. The joys of milestones reached. The first time they roll over, crawl and those first steps.........chubby baby arms reaching up for you, bright eyes and gummy smiles.<br />Sometimes it is hard to believe that all those things exist now only as memories, it seems like yesterday that I had my babies safe around me, and now they all have babies of their own. And they live so far away, my tender mothers heart is really missing them.<br />This will be a Mothers day like no other, the first one away from all my children. But the memory hole is full. Clumsy drawings with uneven printing, homemade heartfelt cards, hugs and kisses that smell of peanutbutter. All safely tucked away to be treasured but brought out to be enjoyed again.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1147346938582535232006-05-11T07:00:00.000-04:002006-05-11T07:28:58.603-04:00A Strange Thinghappened the other day when I was at Wal Mart. I had gone in to pick up a few things, the store was not overly busy, but I have a talent for finding the slowest check out. The line can be moving right along, I get into it and it slows down or stops completely.<br />So I was standing in my slow line, finally it was my turn to put my stuff up to be checked out. No hello, good afternoon, nothing......just a quick look at me and then my items, and the cashier began to scan my items. As I was waiting for the process to be over, I was putting the bags into the cart. The cashier gave me my total, I paid, then put a couple more bags in the cart. But I knew I had purchased more than what I had in the cart bagged up. So I went looking for the other bags. They were at the cashiers' feet, I looked at her strangely and asked for the rest of my bags. She said that those were left by another customer and I had all my purchases. <br />I know that I didn't have everything, and asked her again for the bags. She told me that if I didn't leave she would call a manager. I looked her square in the eye and said, go ahead and call a mamager, and the store manager had better be one of them. A mamager shortly showed up and asked what the problem was, the cashier repilede that I wouldn't leave. The manager asked me if there was a problem. I told her that I would be happy to leave if I could get the rest of the things I had paid for, and pointed to the bags at the cashiers feet. Then I requested the store manager again.<br />When he finally showed up, I handed him my recipt, and told him I didn't have all my purchases, once again pointing to the area around the cashiers feet. They began checking what I had in the cart against the recipt, and guess what? A lot of things were missing. So they moved on to the bags the cashier had put down by her feet. And there was the rest of my groceries.<br />I got profuse apologies from the management and the cashier was escorted to the back.<br /><br />Are people getting so desperate that they are trying to steal in this fashion? It really makes me wonder.........Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1147004776259829222006-05-07T08:05:00.000-04:002006-05-07T10:13:24.490-04:00Derby DayWe spent most of the day yesterday watching the sights and races via a local TV channel (who was providing coverage and commentary). There were thousands of people at Churchill Downs on a bright and sunny Saturday for the Run for the Roses. One of the traditions of race day is to dress up in your finest, and that MUST include a hat. Especially for the ladies. This hat thing is truly a big deal. Most of the hats are custom made, either by the wearer or a hat shop. They were very intresting to watch, but the outfits are secondary to the hat.<br />Needless to say the horses were definately things of beauty. It was captivating to watch them in the races, stretching out in long strides. It was easy to see that the horses were eager to run.<br />Today is, so far, overcast and gray. Such a contrast to yesterday. However it does bring a mental image, somewhat fitting I suppose, for the empty grounds of the track. Yesterday there was sunshine, blue skies and crowds of happy people. Today gray skies and only the echoes of the revelry and competition............Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1146745614567001482006-05-04T08:14:00.000-04:002006-05-04T08:26:54.580-04:00For LewlewIn the garden we have planted<br />sweet corn<br />green beans<br />peas<br />lettuce<br />carrots<br />radishes<br />cucumbers<br />pickling cucumbers<br />green onions<br />yellow onions<br />cabbage<br />potatoes<br />sunflowers<br />pumpkins<br />dill<br />tomatoes<br />I also have a seperate herb garden that has basil, parsley, mints, oregano and cilantro.<br />I am keeping my fingers crossed that we have a good harvest and are able to preserve most of it for the winter.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18801647.post-1146484612809313552006-05-01T07:36:00.000-04:002006-05-01T07:56:52.833-04:00The GardenOn a warm and breezy afternoon I was communing with nature. Striving to be a part of the bird song, the buzzing of the bees, and the gentle babble of the creek. I was becoming part of it all, becoming one with the soil in the garden..........ok so I was actually becoming more of a dirt ball....but it sounded so much better the other way.<br />However, I am happy to report that the garden has been planted. So now I will keep my fingers crossed that we have a good result and pray it doesn't get eaten off by a bunch of rabbits or deer.<br />Shortly after the garden was finished it began to rain. Then we had showers off and on all day Sunday. Hopefully that will give the garden a jump start, now we could use some sunshine, but showers are in the forecast again today. But we might get some sunshine in between.Morriganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06594104544773330809noreply@blogger.com1