In the year 2007, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the
United States, and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and
overpopulated and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another
Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."
He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have six months to build the
Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights".
Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard
. . but no ark.
"Noah", He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark ?"
"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah. "But things have changed. I needed a
building permit. I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for
a sprinkler system. My neighbors claim that I've violated the
neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding
the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for
a decision. Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be
posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead
obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea. I
argued that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing
of it.
Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local
trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the
environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls. But no go!
When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by an animal rights
group. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their
will. As well, they argued the accommodation was too restrictive and it
was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.
Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted
an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.
I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission
on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew. Also,
the trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire
only Union workers with Ark building experience. To make matters worse,
the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country
illegally with endangered species.
So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least ten years for me to
finish this Ark. "
Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow
stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean,
You're not going to destroy the world?".
"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Which Tarot card are you?
You are The High Priestess
Science, Wisdom, Knowledge, Education.
The High Priestess is the card of knowledge, instinctual, supernatural, secret knowledge. She holds scrolls of arcane information that she might, or might not reveal to you. The moon crown on her head as well as the crescent by her foot indicates her willingness to illuminate what you otherwise might not see, reveal the secrets you need to know. The High Priestess is also associated with the moon however and can also indicate change or fluxuation, particularily when it comes to your moods.Find out which Tarot card you are.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Words
When you think about it, words can be very funny things. Depending on the context and intent of the user, they can mean different things.
Take the word, truth for example. The dictionary defines truth as:
Conformity to fact or actuality.
A statement proven to be or accepted as true.
Sincerity; integrity.
Fidelity to an original or standard.
Reality; actuality.
often Truth That which is considered to be the supreme reality and to have the ultimate meaning and value of existence.
Sometimes I find it amazing that people can convince themselves that they can bend, mold or ignore the meaning of words to suit a situation. Kind of the end justifying the means.
Sometimes I have words or the meaning of the word get stuck in my thoughts. I think of the person that has used a particular word recently, and I wonder just what their intended meaning really was. Words can be so powerful, hurtful, liberating, or deceptive.
Deceive is another very interesting word, ( deceive, to cause to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid ) along with one of its synonyms, beguile.
Beguile stresses the use of charm and persuasion in deceiving.
Occasionally we need to stop and look at the way we use words. At the very least think about the way that words are being used by others.
Take the word, truth for example. The dictionary defines truth as:
Conformity to fact or actuality.
A statement proven to be or accepted as true.
Sincerity; integrity.
Fidelity to an original or standard.
Reality; actuality.
often Truth That which is considered to be the supreme reality and to have the ultimate meaning and value of existence.
Sometimes I find it amazing that people can convince themselves that they can bend, mold or ignore the meaning of words to suit a situation. Kind of the end justifying the means.
Sometimes I have words or the meaning of the word get stuck in my thoughts. I think of the person that has used a particular word recently, and I wonder just what their intended meaning really was. Words can be so powerful, hurtful, liberating, or deceptive.
Deceive is another very interesting word, ( deceive, to cause to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid ) along with one of its synonyms, beguile.
Beguile stresses the use of charm and persuasion in deceiving.
Occasionally we need to stop and look at the way we use words. At the very least think about the way that words are being used by others.
Friday, March 02, 2007
The Insanity Continues
What do I see when I go to look at news today? More coverage of the dead blond bimbo.
Let to go.
Let to go.
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